“When are you having more children?” “Time for Another!” “Why Doesn’t ___ Have Kids Yet?” & other comments that don’t mean to hurt, but can.

This post has been mulling around in my head for a while, saved as a draft for weeks, as yet another pregnancy announcement has come. Spring is a time for new beginnings, fresh growth, and the celebration of new life. I so get it! I love pregnancy, I’ve been through a few myself, but even so, I really think we need some education on the appropriateness of the question “are you pregnant?” and it’s variants. I know that some will feel their feathers being ruffled by my words, feel defensive, or offer an explanation/apology–but please hear me out, you apologizing to me is not the goal.

I already wrote about postpartum depression once before, but I want to mention it again for two reasons:

1. I have a lot of friends who just recently had babies (not their first), and let me just tell you PPD is a whole different beast with subsequent births for a myriad of reasons.
2. In dealing with my own depression, I have relearned the value in speaking up and showing up.

Easy 31-Day Workout Schedule

I’m 8 months postpartum, and bathing suit season is fast approaching. I HATE working out, I hate being sore, I hate being tired, and I hate sacrificing time to make it happen. But, I also don’t like looking like a toothpick with no muscle tone, so I had to come to terms with the fact that if I want to look different, I have to do something about it.

My goal is to work out every day in March. I know in general that doing strenuous workouts without a rest day every few days isn’t good for you, but I also know how I am, and in order for this to become a habit for me, I have to do SOMETHING every day. I’m titling this “Let’s March,” because in addition to liking positive life changes, I also LOVE a good pun.

Our first birth experience was a long, natural, hospital delivery of our rainbow baby, Claire. It was amazing, hard, and beautiful. Before becoming pregnant with Claire, we suffered a miscarriage at 10 weeks. I was devastated by that experience, so when we got pregnant again, I was grateful but extremely anxious. All pregnancy loss is sad, but there’s something especially tragic about losing your first because it forever taints your experience. When your only frame of reference up to that point is a loss, even a healthy pregnancy has an extra layer of fear and anxiety.

Three years later, I can still remember the most vivid details of this eventful day. Things like what songs I sang, what I ate for dinner, and where we parked at the hospital.