Ah, motherhood. It’s beautiful. It’s messy. It’s wonderful. It’s so so so hard. It’s an attachment and bond like no other. Nothing else in this world comes close, and I’m not sure it ever will.

I so wish I’d been better educated going into motherhood. I read books and took classes but it was all based on a very idealistic (ahem, fantasy) situation which in real life turns out to be so much more nuanced and generational than anything I’d ever dreamed up.

It’s seems every year I only manage to get one or two Advent posts out in the blogosphere, despite planning for way more. Yet here we are once again—it’s December 5, and…well, here’s my first post.

“There are a lot of reasons to wear a mask, even if you hate it.” Eighteen months in, and still having these hard discussions with people. I think the frustration I feel is due to the inconsistency in messaging. When I take a step back and reevaluate, I feel frustrated by my own lack of control, and lately, the feeling that my safety net has betrayed our highest calling in the interest of a divisive political issue.

Well hey there, you’re back! Which tells me you’re not sick of this series I’ve been doing on my youngest. (No idea what’s going on? That’s ok! Check out parts 1, 2, and 3 here to get caught up.) For now, I think I’ve mostly given a high level update from birth through about ten months old. In this post, I’ll continue to share our toddler’s journey with hypotonia and the process to diagnosing or ruling out any causes of the delays in her gross motor development.